unWanted...

I hate to see ppl hurt. I hate them clashing head on with problems esp if they are a repeat offender with that specific problem.
I want to help, I want to ease their burden. Problem is ppl become attached to said problem. Its their baby, their constant. Its become familiar to them, their safety blanket. Without being able to grip about it, they lose what they deem important. This problem(s) give them a part of their identity.
The trap I fall into is thinking they want out. Thinking they actually want to leave this burden behind them. They don't. Its become like and extra arm or leg, they identify with and are identify by it. Like some women who are overweight but truly don't take steps to fix it. Or adults who had abusive childhoods. Instead of wanting to work through the emotions they cling to them. Or divorced spouses. Instead of moving on letting go, they hold on tightly.
Then I make the mistake of intervening. Thinking they actually are expressing their feelings and concerns to me as something to work through.
No sadly its just something else to hold on to. Something else to grasp. If I'm not careful I fall into the same pit get wound by the same cord of despise.
This isn't me though. I'm tired of the knot in my stomach and shaking hands. I'm tired of the dooms day it brings. I don't like dwelling in sorrow and pity. I like taking the bulls by the horn, fix what I can and let God deal with the rest.
The realization is not everyone feels this way. Many many ppl enjoy the lake of despair. Not me not this gal. Every cloud has a silver lining, every rainbow has a pot of gold.